Essential Question Response: Thinking Positive!!!! :D

What will make me happy?

I have decided to make a list of all the reasons I am happy now, and a list for the future of why I should be happy, with a reason for every day of the week.

Why I am Happy Now:

• When we listened to the judges' commentary on our performance at Parade of Bands, neither of them said anything bad about my solo.
• When I was practicing French Horn after school, one of the band directors came out of his office and told me that I've improved tons and sound really good.
• Tomorrow I have tons of breaks.
• All my homework is done.
• I got a good grade on the last math test.
• I hung out with friends after practicing, and laughed a lot.
• This is a pretty picture:
  

Reasons to be Happy Every Day of the Week:
Monday-- I get to see friends at school, I get to go to the band room, MuggleNet updates the Caption Contest, and MuggleCast comes out with a new PodCast episode
Tuesday-- 'Shrub Monkeys' (an internet comic strip) is updated, it is no longer Monday, and I have French Horn lessons
Wednesday-- Halfway through the week, Lost is on, and this week it's my friend's birthday and we have a band concert
Thursday-- 'Tales From Band Camp' is updated, Television Without Pity comes out with a new Lost review / parody / summary, and it's almost Friday
Friday-- Anime Club, traditional family buffet / movie night, and it's FRIDAY (also, during the marching season there's either a football game today or tomorrow)
Saturday-- It's the weekend (also, during the marching season there's either a football game today or there was one yesterday, which means that in addition to marching band fun, I'm at a sleepover or about to be)
Sunday-- It's the weekend, my homework and chores are done, I am free, and tomorrow I get to see my school friends again

Strangely, I am now less happy than when I started writing this. Probably because I mentioned marching band a few times and am now suffering (again) from Marching Band Withdrawal Syndrome. *sigh* 3 months and four days until the first day of band camp...

Essential Question Response: Ka Wai Ola

What will make me happy?

Before I begin my real post, I want to follow up on a previous blog entry about the band concert. On Friday, we played in the Parade of Bands, which is a music festival where bands play and are judged. We haven't gotten our scores yet, but I do know that I did not slaughter my solo as I expected to. Hopefully I can put a recording of the concert up soon.

Now on to the real post.

My friend Chelsea and I recently signed up to be on the staff of Ka Wai Ola, which is a small book of short stories, art, and poems written by students. There are two books made every school year-- a winter edition and and spring edition. Chelsea and I read the winter edition and really enjoyed it, so we are now helping to put together the spring edition.

I really enjoy reading different submissions and discussing them, and it's going to be a great feeling when everything is assembled and I can hold the final product in my hand, and know that I was a part of the process that made it possible. It's a really fun thing to be involved in, and I look forward to signing up again next year.

Essential Question Response: Solo!

What will make me happy?

First of all-- I had to put this in here-- one thing in the recent past has made me very, very happy. My class has, at last, finished 'The Woman Warrior', and while there is still a final paper to be written, I nonetheless greatly enjoyed the feeling of slamming that [expletive deleted] book shut.

Now on to the real post.

At 4:30 on April 27th, a bit more than a week from now, I will be sitting in an auditorium, preparing for my first band performance of 2007. Normally this would be a happy-- maybe a bit stressful-- occasion, but fun. Nothing to worry too much about-- after all, if you know the music, what could go wrong? Sadly, if you are first chair and have a solo, the answer is 'everything.'

Don't get me wrong-- I absolutely love band, love playing French Horn, and was thrilled to find that my favorite song of the concert (Into the Raging River by Steven Reineke) contained two solos for me to play. But as the performance approaches, I am getting more than a bit nervous. While I can play the music, and normally don't get nervous attacks at concerts, solo is obviously very different. Playing forte while everyone else is playing piano (or not playing at all) is fine. But doing so in front of a large crowd of people-- some of whom are judges-- is not.

I am not a stranger to panic attacks--I've had them during auditions, before performances, when a Certain Someone is in the vicinity-- and they are not pleasant. All I can say is that sweaty hands and a high heart rate are not going to help my musicality.

But now to cut off the rant of stress and panic. I am doing my best to view these solos as an opportunity. I have a chance to perform and show my love of music to people outside of my school, a chance for me, and me alone, to convey that love of music to everyone listening. If I focus on that, instead of imagining bloodthirsty judges with pencils poised to record every mistake (too late!), I know that I'll be able to overcome the panic and play for the reason I am in band: because I love music. And music makes me very, very happy. And by thinking of that, by getting lost in the music instead of the stage-lights, I can play well. Which will also make me very happy.